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Tuesday, April 25, 2006

Shittin' yer pants, liberal style

So, I have this liberal lawyer "friend" who regularly stops by my fine Christian establishment to mooch my God-given coffee and steal blank CD-ROMs. Asshole.

Well, the other day, he brings his snot-nosed kid, and his snot-nosed kid has to take a shit. Now, being that he's a liberal and all, I'm surprised the kid didn't just take a shit on my Bible and then wipe his ass with the American flag, but the liberal had at least the common decency to drag the kid into the bathroom across the hall, to have his kid shit out the bean sprouts and tofu that his hippie vegan mother had been abusing him with.

But, there's a problem.

The stall is occupado.

So, the kid shits his pants, and the whiny liberal comes whining to me that someone (the janitor) was monopolizing the stall and caused his kid to shit his pants.

What the hell? Does this pinko want some nanny state to make sure that there are enough bathroom stalls in good, Christian run buildings so that little snot-nosed brats don't shit their pants?

This world is coming to an end, folks. I can't even enjoy going to work to escape the wife and kids without some whiny liberal and his shitty kid showing up to bum me out.

Why isn't Congress working on this? Shit-panted kids are my Terri Schiavo, goddammit. I demand action!

-- Richie
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Comments on "Shittin' yer pants, liberal style"


Blogger Carl said ... (Tuesday, April 25, 2006 2:32:00 PM) : 

dat's a gut point, Richie! Dey should do like Terri Shitavo and crap dere Depends, jah!


Blogger Betty Jo Goering said ... (Wednesday, April 26, 2006 3:36:00 PM) : 

Aww, see, if'n that kid didn't have dirty libruals stuffin him fulla fiber-crap, he wouldnta made in his dungarees. Poor librual kid. Sorry you had to deal with this rude nasty mofo greasy hair patchooli-smellin librual, Richie. I knows how you hate them!


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