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Sunday, September 03, 2006

Breaking: Steve Irwin Killed By Stingray

In this undated photo, environmentalist Steve Irwin feeds a human baby to an alligator.

Back in June, Richie McWhite posted a photo of a brave phalanx of anti-Islamofascist cow nose rays. Tonight we find out that Steve Irwin, known world-wide as 'The Crocodile Hunter', was killed by a ray while diving in Australia's Great Barrier Reef. We are always right!

BRISBANE, Australia - Steve Irwin, the Australian television personality and environmentalist known as the Crocodile Hunter, was killed Monday by a stingray barb during a diving expedition, Australian media reported. He was 44.

This death proves that, although Irwin often wrestled Islamofascist alligator terrorists, he actually was an demented Islamofascistpinkocommietreehugger moonbat lunatic. Rest in peace, insane treehugger!
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Blogger Freedom Fan said ... (Monday, September 04, 2006 1:19:00 AM) : 

Crikey, Steve Irwin went the way all of us proly would like to go. Glamorously slain by a lover with a dagger to the heart.

Anyway it sure beats choking on a ham sandwich or sleeping with Loreena Bobbitt.

Which reminds me: What is the difference between Loreena Bobbitt and a weather forecaster? When Loreena Bobbitt says there will be four inches on the ground in the morning, you had better believe it.


Blogger Carl said ... (Monday, September 04, 2006 4:28:00 AM) : 

Nein, Shporty, everyvun knows dat der shting ray is der terrorismeest! Mein leeberal impostor, dis Actor212, hast posted ein article about poor Mr. Irvin, a fine conservative who vuz into harassing und sexually abusing wildlife as God intended man to do!

So eef Actor212 t'inks Irwin vuz a creep, dat means der shting rays must be terrorismists, since Actor212 is a terorrismist sympathising moonbat leebral!


Anonymous Rex Kramer, Danger Seeker said ... (Monday, September 04, 2006 5:22:00 AM) : 

Thank God for the self-written obituary. I keep a number of these on file for those I consider likely to die a) relatively soon, and, b) in a predictable manner (next up, Lindsay Lohan...naked, in a Vegas hotel room...bank it!)

Admittedly, I had to copy and paste "stingray" where some variation of "croc" had been in Irwin's obit, but in my defense "celebrity death poolism" is hardly an exact science.


Blogger Sporty said ... (Monday, September 04, 2006 1:29:00 PM) : 


Of course I'm NOT wrong! The valiant anti-Islamofascist, anti-environmentalist ray used it's ninja fighting techniques to stab Irwin in the chest. Irwin was merely pretending to harass wildlife as he raised tons of money to preserve it -- that deception is a sure sign of extremism!

The stingray being a patriot is the only rational explanation.

And Fan,

Ummmmmmm... what are you saying? That the cause of Irwin's death is an urban myth like Mamma Cass's? Or due to having his penis severed by his wife? And really you ought to update your plaigiarized jokes - The Bobbit thing happened in the pre-Islamofascist days of 1993.

(And it wasn't even 4 inches.) Try again.


Blogger Carl said ... (Monday, September 04, 2006 1:52:00 PM) : 

Fawn vishes he vuz der ham sandveech dat Cass choked on! As it ees, he cannot choike der ant.


Blogger Sporty said ... (Monday, September 04, 2006 5:12:00 PM) : 

Ah! That's it! Thanks, Carl! I never can understand that unhinged moonbat lunatic - but who can understand any unhinged moonbat lunatic?

And now what about the Bobbitt thing? Does that mean he wishes he was John Wayne Bobbit?


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